Ostriches, Group Dynamics, and ADHD

Ostriches live in small groups. The photo shows a relatively large group. If there were an ostrich with ADHD, it would probably say: "I never know when it's my turn to speak, so I just don't participate," or "It's hard for me to focus on a conversation with Yoav because Yochanan screamed behind me laughing," or even "It's always embarrassing — everyone is talking about something and I have no idea what, because I just zoned out."

When a child has ADHD, they miss information of all kinds: a piece of data needed to solve an exercise, a homework assignment, something Dad said, and yes — also social information: a joke, coordinating a meetup, or social codes.

A child has forgetfulness due to mental overload and disorganized thinking — arriving at school without their backpack, forgetting it's their turn to wash dishes. The child will also forget things they coordinated with friends. There's also difficulty acquiring social codes or simply noticing what everyone is talking about or laughing at... and sometimes it just looks odd, and their friends might mock them. Another example: when kids meet at a playground because they arranged it, or in a social video game, and the child simply didn't notice they made plans, or forgot — missing a social gathering.

When the child grows up, they still have ADHD. In the best case, there are many strategies for compensating, acceptance, and self-love. Self-esteem has been built along with a sense of self-efficacy (the belief in one's innate ability to achieve goals — a challenging area for those with ADHD). There may even be great friendships, because their ADHD also includes vibrancy and joy that people love. A great relationship, really... But still, there's missed information.

So if you have ADHD, how is it for you in group settings?